


Trust Fall

by AudreyV



Category: How to Get Away with Murder
Genre: BDSM, Begging, Bondage, Boss/Employee Relationship, Consensual Non-Consent, Consent Play, Dom/sub, F/F, Lesbian Sex, Pain, Rough Sex, Spanking, Submission
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-31
Updated: 2016-12-31
Packaged: 2018-09-13 22:03:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9143950
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AudreyV/pseuds/AudreyV
Summary: Bonnie felt her cheeks go pink.  She glanced at the chair, then carefully walked around the desk and knelt at Annalise’s feet.“I see,” Annalise said quietly.  “You want to stay?”“Yes.”“Mmm.  Like last time?” Annalise asked, voice low and vibrating with tension.Bonnie started to nod, then shook her head.  “Not exactly.”--Bonnie isn't nearly as fragile as people think.  She's not going to break--- and even if she did, she trusts Annalise with all of her.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I wasn't so sure about this fic, which started as a fill for a kinkmeme prompt from last year for "Annalise/Bonnie, consent play." (Ultimately I filled that with "Deeply, Slowly, Carefully," which is about very explicit consent & felt much, much safer to post.) This one goes the consensual non-consent route, but after a year of gleefully writing this pairing I'm going to give myself the benefit of the doubt that I did this complicated setup the justice it deserves & that you won't judge me too harshly if it turns out I didn't. ;)
> 
> Happy New Year, my Bonnalise buddies.

"I told you to go home." Annalise sat at her desk in a wine colored nightgown, looking up at Bonnie as she poured herself another vodka. “You’re not going to get anywhere with that brief tonight.”

“I know.”Bonnie smiled wanly and glanced away.“I wanted to talk about something else.”

Annalise thought for a moment, then shrugged and gestured to the chair opposite her. 

“The floor is yours, Miss Winterbottom,” she quipped. 

Bonnie felt her cheeks go pink.She glanced at the chair, then carefully walked around the desk and knelt at Annalise’s feet.

“I see,” Annalise said quietly.“You want to stay?”

“Yes.”

“Mmm.Like last time?” Annalise asked, voice low and vibrating with tension. 

Bonnie started to nod, then shook her head.“Not exactly.”

She watched Annalise smile like she understood, even though she couldn’t have made the leap.Annalise took the time to drain her glass and pour another before she returned her gaze to the other woman. 

“How would it be different?”She paused, but no response came. 

Bonnie shifted and rubbed the back of her neck in a familiar anxious habit.She glanced up and saw the other woman's face soften.

“Talk to me,” Annalise said, gently stilling Bonnie’s hand.“Tell me what’s going on in that complicated brain of yours.”

Bonnie nodded.She placed both of her hands on Annalise’s lap, then rested her cheek on them.They sat in silence as Annalise tucked a few wayward strands of blonde hair behind Bonnie’s ear.

"I don't want to use the safe word.” 

”I hope not,” Annalise chuckled dryly.“I didn't think petting your hair would be too much for you.”

"No.”She turned into the touch and grazed Annalise’s palm with her lips.“I mean I don’t want the option of using it."

"Don't be ridiculous." Annalise sat up straight in her chair, pulling away in the process. 

"I mean it." 

"Safe words exist for a reason.”

The sharp, patronizing tone of voice made Bonnie bristle and grow more resolute. She sat back on her heels, took a deep breath and began again.

“I spend the whole time wondering if I should say it or if I can take more,”she said firmly.“The only way I’ll be able to relax is if we take it away."

“No.”

“Annalise—“

“You asking this…” Annalise shook her head.Her eyes searched back and forth across the ceiling for an answer that didn’t come, then fell back down to her hands.Finally she looked at Bonnie, who was waiting, calm but intent.“It makes me wonder if you’re trying to get me to hurt you for real.”

“No,” Bonnie said quickly.“This isn’t me being reckless, Annalise.”

“That’s what it looks like from the outside.”She sighed deeply.Another vodka, a glance down at her associate, a second glass begrudgingly retrieved from the drawer of her desk.Annalise poured a stiff measure for both of them. “What happens if things go wrong, and you can’t tell me? I push too far and suddenly you’re back to being the wrecked, scared girl who couldn’t look me in the eye after the first time I took her to bed.”

“You were my professor and my boss,” Bonnie said evenly. “And you didn’t take me to bed.You called me into your office and fucked me on your desk, and as soon as you sobered up you acted like it didn’t even happen.Can you blame me for not knowing how I should behave afterward?”

Annalise looked down at Bonnie, who despite her words was gazing up with a fond expression.She shook her head. 

“Exactly.Besides, we’re different people now,” Bonnie added, and they both knew it was true.

“So how do you see this going?”

“I take off my clothes and you have your way with me.” Bonnie shrugged. “I want you to push me further than you think I can go.”

“And you say you’re not being reckless.”

“I can’t remember the last time I used the safe word.”

“But you’ve thought about it.”

“All the time, which is why I’d like to stop,” Bonnie said gently.“I don’t want a choice in what happens to me.”

“That sounds—“

“I know how it sounds.”  Her face grew serious, tense for the first time since the conversation began.“And I know I should be disgusted by the idea of someone else having all this power over me. But when I think about being out of control, and giving myself over to you completely..." 

"It turns you on,” Annalise murmured, and Bonnie nodded.

"So much."  

Annalise leaned down and took Bonnie’s face in her hands, eyes boring into her.She leaned down and brought their lips together. 

Bonnie melted into the kiss.Her heart thudded against her chest.As Annalise’s tongue explored her mouth, Bonnie wondered if this meant she’d be getting what she wanted, but all too quickly Annalise pulled away.

“I’ll think about it,” she said finally. 

“Thank you.I promise I know what I'm asking."

"Okay." Annalise stroked Bonnie's cheek gently, then tipped her head up. She stared into her associate’s face for a long moment. "Go home, Bonnie."

 

——  


 

Bonnie did as she was told. She went home and started to make herself a cup of tea, but by the time the kettle started to whistle shrilly, she'd abandoned the idea in favor of bourbon. After two drinks she took a very hot shower and got ready for bed. 

She slid between the sheets (not as nice as Annalise's, but still comfortable). She was staring at the framed butterfly specimens on her bedroom wall, debating if she should take something to help her get to sleep, when her phone chimed. 

_*Are you 100% sure you want to go without the safe word?*_

_*Yes.*_

_*And if I break you?*_

_*I trust you to put me back together.*_

_*When I put the vacuum cleaner back together I ended up with a bunch of extra pieces and a $600 Dyson shaped lawn ornament.*_

_*Luckily I have fewer moving parts.*_

_*Very funny. Sleep well.*_

_*You too.*_

She placed the phone on her bedside table and turned off the light. Her eyes were drifting closed when her phone chimed again.

_*We can try tomorrow night.If you still want to.*_

Bonnie read the words and felt a rush of warmth in her chest.She thought she should have been worried or nervous about what could happen, but all she felt was a radiating sense of calm. 

Less than ten minutes later, she was sleeping peacefully. 

 

——

 

If Bonnie could have had a coherent thought, she would have wondered if the neighbors could hear her shrieking, and if anyone would call the police.(After an awkward conversation in the driveway several days later, she’d know at least one of them did hear, which made the fact that no one dialed 911 especially unsettling.)

In the moment, she had no concerns outside the room, or even outside of her own body.Annalise’s hand came down hard again on the back of her left thigh. 

The first time, it had been a pleasant sting.The fifth, a sharp hurt, one that made her clench her entire body to keep from writhing. 

She’d lost track after the 23 rd , too awash in the agony of it to analyze it from a distance.  She’d started off bent over Annalise’s lap with her body wound tight like a bowstring.  Now she was slumped over, too exhausted to do much more than sob with each new blow. 

“Go lie on the bed.On your back,” Annalise ordered.It took Bonnie a few moments of deep breathing to pull herself together enough to rise to her feet.She took several shaky steps toward the bed.

The sheets were as incredible as ever, but even their smooth expanse was excruciating when she rolled over.The back of her thigh was on fire.It felt like the whole of her body weight was pressing down on that bit of swollen flesh. 

Annalise strolled over to the bed and surveyed Bonnie’s naked form, starting at her toes and going up. 

“Put your hands above your head.” 

Bonnie did as she was told, even though the idea sent a chill through her.This wasn’t part of their usual routine— although, really, their usual routine would have ended with spanking number 17, since Annalise was overly cautious about pushing Bonnie too far.(If Bonnie could have, she might have called the safe word after she lost track of the blows, but without the option she had to let herself endure it.)She pressed her panic down deep in her chest as she felt a cord being wrapped around her wrists, which were then secured to the bedpost.

Annalise would take care of her.That was the point of all of this.  Trusting the woman who was looking down at her with an expression Bonnie’s foggy mind couldn’t quite decipher.

Their eyes met and Annalise’s lips curved into the briefest of smiles. 

“I wish you could see yourself right now.Every inch of you is so pale, except for the flush on your chest and your cheeks.”Another smile, and then a hand quick as lightning smacked her hip. “And except for there,” she noted.Bonnie glanced down and saw red welts forming in the shape of fingers. 

“And here,” Annalise added, a fingertip circling one of Bonnie’s nipples.They were already hard, had been since Annalise ordered her to strip.Dark fingers contrasted with the pale brownish pink of her areoles.They plucked at the nub, gently stimulating it for a moment before clamping down.

Bonnie wailed as pain radiated through her.It lit up each part of her body, making a circuit from her swollen thigh to the handprint on her hip to her breast.Just before it threatened to became too much, Annalise gave the rosy peak a final pinch before palming it roughly. 

“Maybe I’m a bad person for enjoying your suffering,” Annalise mused in a light tone, as if she might have been discussing dinner plans.She stepped back, let Bonnie catch her breath.“There must be something wrong with me, that smacking your ass while you squirm in my lap makes me want to fuck you.”She laughed sharply as she retrieved her glass from the opposite bedside table.“But at least I have company in my perversions.As much as I like hurting you, you like being hurt twice as much.Don’t you?”

“Yes,” Bonnie heard herself say in a tone much more raspy than normal. 

“Tell me how much.”

“So much.I love it when you hurt me.” Bonnie tried to keep her breathing even as Annalise drifted toward the bed.

“Tell me three specific physical sensations you feel right now,” Annalise instructed as she loomed over Bonnie, who swallowed hard.

“Uh… pressure on my wrists where they’re tied to the bed.Heat on the back of my leg.”Her tongue darted out and ran across her upper lip as she gathered words.“And a pulsing, full feeling in my clit.” 

“Very precise.Good girl,” Annalise murmured.She finished her vodka, then placed the glass on the end table and straddled Bonnie, who  gasped as the other woman’s weight pressed her sore leg into the mattress.She reflexively tried to move, pulling hard at the binding that held her arms. 

Annalise shifted forward, placing one hand at the side of her head while the other drifted up to caress her slit.

“Spread your legs,” she said and Bonnie did, wincing as her raw skin slid across the sheets. 

Annalise shifted so both of her legs were between Bonnie’s.She hovered over the blonde, stared down at her for a few blistering heartbeats before plunging three fingers inside her. 

Bonnie wasn’t expecting the sudden penetration and she groaned, relieved she slick enough for Annalise to sink in deep.As the other woman began to thrust, Bonnie’s body felt formless, almost weightless, but simultaneously crushed under an invisible force that wouldn’t let her move from the mattress.

“Look at me,” Annalise ordered.Bonnie didn’t remember closing her eyes, but they were shut tight.She wrenched them open, looked up into familiar dark eyes as she felt her body start to reach for its unraveling. 

She’d never been so vulnerable before.Annalise could fuck her until all her nerves were jangling and raw and she was begging for mercy.Or she could get up just when Bonnie was on the edge and leave her there, tied to the bed, whimpering and pleading to come. 

Bonnie wasn’t sure which idea was more terrifying in the moment, but all thought fled when Annalise’s free hand covered her mouth, muffling her cries.She tried to turn her head away, swiveled her hips from side to side, yanked harder at the ropes around her wrists.Her brain tilted and whirled until she was dizzy.A vise tightened around her chest and her lungs throbbed, making her struggle for breath after ragged breath. 

She felt herself crack.  Whatever it was that made her this person, that made her Bonnie, caved in on itself.  Darkness crowded the edges of her vision before rushing to the center as Annalise’s hand pushed her further and further toward sharp oblivion. 

“That’s it.Come for me, Bonnie,” a voice said, but it was far away and drowned out by the rush of blood through her ears.The hand that had been covering her mouth stroked her cheek.

“St— stop, stop, I can’t—“ she begged.“It’s too much, please, I can’t—“

“You can,” the voice said in a velvety tone, but Bonnie kept pleading until lips pressed hard against hers.She let Annalise kiss her deeply, her whole body shaking as the orgasm hit like lightning splits the sky. 

Bonnie whined deep in her throat as wave after wave crashed over her.She was hyper aware of every sensation:the throbbing pain of the back of her thigh against the bed, the way her cunt ached as it gripped Annalise’s fingers, the heat that rampaged through her body like a fever. 

Every part of her was tense as she convulsed and thrashed.As the feeling started to ebb away, she felt Annalise shift on top of her.Cool air breezed across her chest and she took a deep, glorious breath.A sense of relief washed over her, but before Bonnie could process it Annalise’s tongue was parting her folds.She shook her head back and forth against the pillow.

“You wanted this, Bonnie.”Annalise’s breath was hot on her inner thigh.She flexed her fingers.“You trust me to take you apart and put you back together?” 

Bonnie made a choked noise but nodded, eyes screwed shut.She pulled hard on the ropes that held her hands.Her wrists hurt— everything hurt— but that was secondary to the agonizing overstimulation that flooded the circuits of her brain.Switches flipped and rolling blackouts cascaded through the disjointed bits of her.The world started to go dark as she shut down.

“Say it.” 

Bonnie blinked up at the ceiling and the oblivion receded.She parsed the words and but didn’t know what she was supposed to say.She must have looked lost, because Annalise asked again, voice gentling.

“Do you trust me?”

The question didn’t make sense to Bonnie.She was cleaved open, barely aware of the edges of her own body, vibrating in place as her mind worked over the idea.It stretched and pulled “trust” like it was taffy even though at that moment “you” and “me” also seemed like bizarre, artificial concepts.For a moment she was back in her head, but then Annalise’s mouth was hot against her clit and strong fingers were moving inside her and Bonnie was all body again. 

“Yes,” she forced out, twisting, one hip coming up off the mattress.Annalise’s free hand pressed her down again and held her there.The pain that flashed through her chafed skin and ricocheted through her body severed the last few threads that held her together.Everything went white hot and bright as she crashed down into an indescribable, overwhelming nirvana of pleasure and pain.

Her body went limp against the mattress.Individual muscles trembled, but as a whole she was spent. Bonnie whimpered as the fingers inside her gently withdrew. She made her eyes focus, watching as Annalise stood and came to her side.

“I’m going to untie your hands,” she said, deft fingers quickly going to work at the knots.When Bonnie’s arms were released, her hands flopped back against the mattress, and Annalise took one, then the other, bringing them down to rest against her ribcage. 

“I’m going to go downstairs, but I’ll be back in a few minutes,” Annalise said.Bonnie nodded slightly, then closed her eyes and listened to the other woman’s footsteps as they left the room and started down the stairs. 

She wasn’t sure how much time had passed when she felt a cool cloth against her forehead.She took a deep breath and relaxed as Annalise gently wiped the sweat and tears from her face. 

“I have an ice pack for your ass.” 

Bonnie felt Annalise grasp under her knee and carefully draw it up so she could place the ice pack between flesh and bed.It hurt, she knew it must hurt, but the pain was muffled, drowned out by how sleepy and safe she felt.

“That’s not my ass,” Bonnie mumbled. 

“What was that?”

“I said that’s not my ass.You beat the hell out of my thigh, not my ass.”

Annalise chuckled.“Very precise, Miss Winterbottom.” 

Bonnie felt a soft blanket cover her.She opened her eyes and turned her head to watch as Annalise added two spoonfuls of sugar to a steaming cup. 

“Tea.A little too hot to drink right now, though.Water?”

Bonnie took the offered bottle and sipped.She watched as Annalise came around to the other side of the bed and slipped in next to her.Bonnie reached out and tugged the other woman over, folding into her arms.They laid that way in silence for a few minutes. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” Annalise asked quietly. 

“I think so.”Bonnie tipped her head up and caught Annalise’s lips with her own.The kiss was gentle and familiar.“Are you okay?”

Annalise considered the question before replying.“Parts of that were— it was intense.But I’m okay.What about you?” 

“I think I’m good.”  She reached out and traced Annalise’s odd expression with her fingertips.“What’s going on?”

Annalise looked away, but Bonnie waited, twined their fingers together, let her thumb gently stroke the inside of a smooth wrist.

“I hate how good it felt to do that,” she murmured finally. 

“Even though I wanted you to?”

“Maybe your mind did.Your body was fighting me as hard as it could.”Annalise’s voice was low in the stillness of the room.

“It was just being unruly.”  Bonnie smiled, but then it wavered, half-faded from her face.“That wasn’t anything like what happened to me.You know that, right?”

“Maybe.”

“No,” she said firmly. “You take care of me.You keep me safe.Every single moment of that, I felt so loved.”

“Good.”Annalise pressed her lips to Bonnie’s temple.“Thank you, for trusting me that much.”

“I trust you with all of me.” 

“Why?”

“Because I’m yours,” Bonnie smiled shyly and looked away.“It was definitely the right call.I don’t think I’ve ever come that hard in my life.”

“You’re not the only one.”Annalise chuckled and brought her lips close to whisper in Bonnie’s ear.“I came just watching you.”


End file.
